Being mindful
Last night at pool we had a brief discussion about customer service. Don't ask me why I continue thinking about these short conversations long after they happen, because I don't know. Anyways, it got me to thinking about life in 2007. People are more withdrawn, and much less personal with everyone they encounter (not as a rule, but as an observation). If you pay attention for one full day, you'll recognize what I'm saying.
Think about the last time you went shopping and made a purchase (even if it was only a pack of gum). What was the look you got from the employee? Did they smile at you? Or even make eye contact? Did you say thank you? Or wish the person a good day? If I'm not mistaken, this was something people used to do. When they asked how you were today, they were really wondering. And when you answered, it wasn't the automatic "I'm OK" or "good thanks".
And another obvious one (especially if you are a commuter). People have stopped holding doors for other people. They open the door with their foot or elbow just enough to get through, and don't even look back to see if there is someone behind them. This is just rude in my opinion. I'm not saying that someone should sit in the passenger seat of a car waiting for the driver to open the door for them (let's not be ridiculous now), but have a little bit of courtesy.
CHALLENGE #1: The next time you ask someone how they are doing, wait for an answer, and listen to their response.
CHALLENGE #2: Next time you buy something, smile at the person working the cash, and say "thanks, have a great day!" and mean it. (Sometimes cashiers will laugh, because they hear and see this soo infrequently)
CHALLENGE #3: Hold a door/elevator for someone, even if you have to wait a few seconds. Face it...you're often not in that much of a hurry. You're just going to work to sit at your desk and check your email/blogs/rants. And if someone pays you this courtesy, say "thank you" and mean it.
To extend my ranting and ravings, I'm not sure why people are soo pessimistic in everyday life. The world is against them (and only them). I think this is in large part a product of ignorance. People tend to ignore the things that are going right, and focus on the things that are going wrong. When they get an email, or any form of written message, they tend to take it the wrong way (often not the way it was meant when written). Not that I'm an eternal optimist or anything, but I'm trying hard to recognize when people are making remarks in general, or when they are trying to send me a not-so-subtle hint. I'm not great at it still, even though I try to make this conscious effort. For example, while playing pool last night my mama dukes made the comment "If this game takes any longer I'm going to miss the end of it, I have to pee soo bad" (or something to that degree). I took it as "this is the longest game ever...", which of course pissed me off a little. But I was pissed at myself for not shooting pool better, and for no good reason either. She was simply making a comment, and it wasn't supposed to be anything personal against me. In fact she uses sarcastic humor A LOT, and it's because the people who know her know that it's her loving way of joking with you.
CHALLENGE #4: When writing or reading a letter/email (etc) consider the various ways in which it can be interpreted before jumping to conclusions about its tone. If the tone of the letter/email (etc) is in question...write back to clarify meaning. (I've tried this one myself when I thought my best friend was pissed at me. It turned out we had the message crossed.)
Take Home Message: Be mindful of what message you're putting across in any moment, and try to understand that others aren't as mindful as you. Don't take things personally (while of course remaining realistic).
I'm going to try hard to take my own advice too...
Think about the last time you went shopping and made a purchase (even if it was only a pack of gum). What was the look you got from the employee? Did they smile at you? Or even make eye contact? Did you say thank you? Or wish the person a good day? If I'm not mistaken, this was something people used to do. When they asked how you were today, they were really wondering. And when you answered, it wasn't the automatic "I'm OK" or "good thanks".
And another obvious one (especially if you are a commuter). People have stopped holding doors for other people. They open the door with their foot or elbow just enough to get through, and don't even look back to see if there is someone behind them. This is just rude in my opinion. I'm not saying that someone should sit in the passenger seat of a car waiting for the driver to open the door for them (let's not be ridiculous now), but have a little bit of courtesy.
CHALLENGE #1: The next time you ask someone how they are doing, wait for an answer, and listen to their response.
CHALLENGE #2: Next time you buy something, smile at the person working the cash, and say "thanks, have a great day!" and mean it. (Sometimes cashiers will laugh, because they hear and see this soo infrequently)
CHALLENGE #3: Hold a door/elevator for someone, even if you have to wait a few seconds. Face it...you're often not in that much of a hurry. You're just going to work to sit at your desk and check your email/blogs/rants. And if someone pays you this courtesy, say "thank you" and mean it.
To extend my ranting and ravings, I'm not sure why people are soo pessimistic in everyday life. The world is against them (and only them). I think this is in large part a product of ignorance. People tend to ignore the things that are going right, and focus on the things that are going wrong. When they get an email, or any form of written message, they tend to take it the wrong way (often not the way it was meant when written). Not that I'm an eternal optimist or anything, but I'm trying hard to recognize when people are making remarks in general, or when they are trying to send me a not-so-subtle hint. I'm not great at it still, even though I try to make this conscious effort. For example, while playing pool last night my mama dukes made the comment "If this game takes any longer I'm going to miss the end of it, I have to pee soo bad" (or something to that degree). I took it as "this is the longest game ever...", which of course pissed me off a little. But I was pissed at myself for not shooting pool better, and for no good reason either. She was simply making a comment, and it wasn't supposed to be anything personal against me. In fact she uses sarcastic humor A LOT, and it's because the people who know her know that it's her loving way of joking with you.
CHALLENGE #4: When writing or reading a letter/email (etc) consider the various ways in which it can be interpreted before jumping to conclusions about its tone. If the tone of the letter/email (etc) is in question...write back to clarify meaning. (I've tried this one myself when I thought my best friend was pissed at me. It turned out we had the message crossed.)
Take Home Message: Be mindful of what message you're putting across in any moment, and try to understand that others aren't as mindful as you. Don't take things personally (while of course remaining realistic).
I'm going to try hard to take my own advice too...
posted by Aimee at 6:02 AM
2 Comments:
Hi,
Thanks for stopping by! Love your blog....teehee!
who stopped by? I feel confused, I'm not sure if the scarcity of my blog is being attacked or what, but I'll point out that Aimee's blog is suffering from neglect, I'm assuming work at the lab has taken a turn towards madness, and she is stuck there constantly, or she is drinking like mad and not coherent enough to use the computer. This is Aron BTW, I couldn't remember my username, so I'm stuck as Anon.
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