Just NOT right...
Baseball season has started! yay!!
So we had our first game on Sunday. It was a beautiful thing. Our team (Robbies softball team to secret readers who are new) is pretty good this year it seems. Everyone was hitting consistently, and staying with plays without trying to be super-heros all the time. All the babies (well not-so-much anymore) are back, and then some!
The majority of our team has remained the same (making me happy) and all of the new guys on the team seem like they'll fit in well. In other words, we haven't got in trouble for heckling them yet, though I'm sure once they work up the balls...
And speaking of balls (since mama dukes was to chicken to post about it)...
One of the new guys on our team (Thumper, if you are reading this...I apologize for calling your attention to it, but something has to be done!!) either
a) has a gigantic 'package' (if you know what I mean, as I'm sure you do...) and likes to make it look even more huge by covering it with an extra-large-I'm-definitly-THE-MAN-sized cup...or
b) has a tiny weenie, and likes to make it look huge by covering it with an (see above...)
BUT, not only does he do this...he also wears the cup to one side (ie it covers one of his thighs and he's a big guy!) and down his leg a distance. I somehow doubt the thing is covering any of the family jewels, mutton dagger, old blind bob, hanging johny, fishing rod, tallywhacker, pocket rocket, one-eyed trouser trout, ding dong, ankle spanker, pork sword, engine cranker, hairy hotdog, davey crocket, wang, wazoo, weeny, whacker, pecker, pee-pee, kidney cracker, heat seeking moisture missle, giggle stick, love whistle, tube steak, uncle dick, purple helmet warrior...or any other pet names for PENIS that you can think of....(oh wow, I'm feeling a little raunchy right now)
IT'S JUST WRONG!!!
I can't go all season trying to hold back laughter every time he walks by, or I happen to glance to the wrong part of the field. Cause you know, I *would* be able to see it all the way from the 300 meter line. I guarentee it.
Someone's gotta slip him a note or something....geeze....
So we had our first game on Sunday. It was a beautiful thing. Our team (Robbies softball team to secret readers who are new) is pretty good this year it seems. Everyone was hitting consistently, and staying with plays without trying to be super-heros all the time. All the babies (well not-so-much anymore) are back, and then some!
The majority of our team has remained the same (making me happy) and all of the new guys on the team seem like they'll fit in well. In other words, we haven't got in trouble for heckling them yet, though I'm sure once they work up the balls...
And speaking of balls (since mama dukes was to chicken to post about it)...
One of the new guys on our team (Thumper, if you are reading this...I apologize for calling your attention to it, but something has to be done!!) either
a) has a gigantic 'package' (if you know what I mean, as I'm sure you do...) and likes to make it look even more huge by covering it with an extra-large-I'm-definitly-THE-MAN-sized cup...or
b) has a tiny weenie, and likes to make it look huge by covering it with an (see above...)
BUT, not only does he do this...he also wears the cup to one side (ie it covers one of his thighs and he's a big guy!) and down his leg a distance. I somehow doubt the thing is covering any of the family jewels, mutton dagger, old blind bob, hanging johny, fishing rod, tallywhacker, pocket rocket, one-eyed trouser trout, ding dong, ankle spanker, pork sword, engine cranker, hairy hotdog, davey crocket, wang, wazoo, weeny, whacker, pecker, pee-pee, kidney cracker, heat seeking moisture missle, giggle stick, love whistle, tube steak, uncle dick, purple helmet warrior...or any other pet names for PENIS that you can think of....(oh wow, I'm feeling a little raunchy right now)
IT'S JUST WRONG!!!
I can't go all season trying to hold back laughter every time he walks by, or I happen to glance to the wrong part of the field. Cause you know, I *would* be able to see it all the way from the 300 meter line. I guarentee it.
Someone's gotta slip him a note or something....geeze....
posted by Aimee at 2:47 PM
5 Comments:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
best post ever.
Not Chicken! Just hovering on the side of self preservation of future friendships which is something you don't have to worry about (he's not your age group!)
Very Accurate post though!
Um yeah, thank you for bringing that to my attention, my eyes are still burning!!!
You forget one though.. what about PURPLE HEADED YOGURT SLINGER???
Not only is purple headed yogurt slinger funny, but, I found "kidney cracker" to be the best term yet.
Anyway, with a name like Thumper, who can blame the guy?
~Aron
Um, wait. I don't claim to be sports-knowledgeable, but isn't the point of a cup to cover, and perhaps even protect, the penis?
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