Taking Care of Business
So I have this roommate who is the definition of donk.
Once in a while I stay up late because I'm feeling productive, and I know that I might lose my groove at any second. So, on these days, if they are followed by a day that I don't have to go to school...I sometimes like to sleep in till like 8am or so. Now, I know this is unusual behavior for me, and so most of the time I can't even blame my roomie for being a donky in the morning But...
I have started doing like he does and leaving my keys in the door to signify that I am home. And if I'm home, and the flourecent light in my room isn't glaring under the door, then I'm probably asleep. But he just doesn't get it...
So after all of the wake-Aimee-up -cause-she-doesn't-need-sleep-anyways incidents I finally decided to seek a bit of revenge. This has built up, so you can't blame me. I am human and I can only take so much.
He tends to play music in the morning. The door to my room is within arms reach of his door and he blasts music on his laptop while he gets breakfast in the kitchen. Hello?? It's a laptop!! It's PORTABLE...idiot. This has happened too many times...and the response I get when I glare at him in the kitchen is "sorry, I didn't know you were home..." so I guess I can really blame him. But;
Flashback to March...I'm sick and cranky and smack dab in the middle of midterms. I am tired and it's like midnight. So, I decide to go to bed and wake up early instead. I have a 13 hour day the next day, and that's just counting classes. I figure I could use the sleep. So, I go to bed, but my nose is plugged and my roomate is fighting with his girlfriend on the phone so it takes me like 2 hours to get to sleep. The last time I looked at the clock was 2:07.
The next time I lloked at the clock was following a panicked banging on my door. My heart was pounding cause I just got woken up from a relativly dead sleep, and I thought maybe there was a fire or something...and then I heard (picture a neandrothaul voice)..."Aimee...do you have a phone card I can borrow?"
To which I responded "Paul, it's 2:30 in the fucking morning..." (Pardon my language but I was really mad...)
And he sais "But it's an emergency..."
Me: "Paul, you didn't replace the last phone card you borrowed..."
Paul: "shit eh...but do you have one...?" And he opens my door.
Me: "Just take it, and get out of my room...and close your door cause your yelling"
And then I was fuming, my heart was racing, I was livid, my nose was plugged and all I could hear was Paul fighting with his stupid girlfriend. I slept 1.25 hours that night. And the next day I was still mad...
Flash Forward to Yesterday.
Greg slept over. He almost never gets to spend any time with me because we are both busy with school (and he has a social life to boot) so it's nice having him visit. And, I don't have classes anymore. It's final exam time people, so time is precious. We watched March of the Penguins (which is a fantabulous movie that you should watch if you havn't seen it) and made a nice dinner, and I told him I'd wake him up at 8:30.
So at 7:15 the phone rings. It's Paul's friend but Paul isn't picking up the phone. So I get out of bed and answer it. Bang on Paul's door and get back into bed. I'm sleeping till 8 and that's final. But no, just as I start to drift off, Paul bangs on my door. (with that voice again) "Aimee...do you have a calculator I can borrow" And then Paul and his friend (who also has a really deep donky voice) decide to talk calculus for like an hour right outside my door. He's lucky I didn't try going back to bed or I would have been more mad.
ARRGG...the things I was thinking in my head...
So, this morning I seek revenge. It was tougher then I had expected. I got up at 6:45, slammed my door on the way to take a shower, and slammed the bathroom door too. I got out of the shower and slammed my door on the way in. Played my music too loud, and kept forgetting things in the kitchen, so I had to open and close my door like 15 times.
It didn't work. So, I did laundry (the machine is in the kitchen cause I live in student housing, and it's loud) and did dishes. This didn't work.
So I made coffee with my kettle that whistles. And, I didn't hear it right away because I was in the bathroom (ah hahaha...I was just chillin in there. I didn't even flush when I came out, so he knew, I'm soo evil). There's nothing like a whistling kettle to wake you up in the morning.
He went into the bathroom and slammed down the toilet seat. I think he might be mad...
But shit, I didn't get to wake you up until 8:30.
Tomorrow morning coffee is at 7am...oh crap, tomorrow's Saterday...next week Paul, I'll have my revenge :)
Once in a while I stay up late because I'm feeling productive, and I know that I might lose my groove at any second. So, on these days, if they are followed by a day that I don't have to go to school...I sometimes like to sleep in till like 8am or so. Now, I know this is unusual behavior for me, and so most of the time I can't even blame my roomie for being a donky in the morning But...
I have started doing like he does and leaving my keys in the door to signify that I am home. And if I'm home, and the flourecent light in my room isn't glaring under the door, then I'm probably asleep. But he just doesn't get it...
So after all of the wake-Aimee-up -cause-she-doesn't-need-sleep-anyways incidents I finally decided to seek a bit of revenge. This has built up, so you can't blame me. I am human and I can only take so much.
He tends to play music in the morning. The door to my room is within arms reach of his door and he blasts music on his laptop while he gets breakfast in the kitchen. Hello?? It's a laptop!! It's PORTABLE...idiot. This has happened too many times...and the response I get when I glare at him in the kitchen is "sorry, I didn't know you were home..." so I guess I can really blame him. But;
Flashback to March...I'm sick and cranky and smack dab in the middle of midterms. I am tired and it's like midnight. So, I decide to go to bed and wake up early instead. I have a 13 hour day the next day, and that's just counting classes. I figure I could use the sleep. So, I go to bed, but my nose is plugged and my roomate is fighting with his girlfriend on the phone so it takes me like 2 hours to get to sleep. The last time I looked at the clock was 2:07.
The next time I lloked at the clock was following a panicked banging on my door. My heart was pounding cause I just got woken up from a relativly dead sleep, and I thought maybe there was a fire or something...and then I heard (picture a neandrothaul voice)..."Aimee...do you have a phone card I can borrow?"
To which I responded "Paul, it's 2:30 in the fucking morning..." (Pardon my language but I was really mad...)
And he sais "But it's an emergency..."
Me: "Paul, you didn't replace the last phone card you borrowed..."
Paul: "shit eh...but do you have one...?" And he opens my door.
Me: "Just take it, and get out of my room...and close your door cause your yelling"
And then I was fuming, my heart was racing, I was livid, my nose was plugged and all I could hear was Paul fighting with his stupid girlfriend. I slept 1.25 hours that night. And the next day I was still mad...
Flash Forward to Yesterday.
Greg slept over. He almost never gets to spend any time with me because we are both busy with school (and he has a social life to boot) so it's nice having him visit. And, I don't have classes anymore. It's final exam time people, so time is precious. We watched March of the Penguins (which is a fantabulous movie that you should watch if you havn't seen it) and made a nice dinner, and I told him I'd wake him up at 8:30.
So at 7:15 the phone rings. It's Paul's friend but Paul isn't picking up the phone. So I get out of bed and answer it. Bang on Paul's door and get back into bed. I'm sleeping till 8 and that's final. But no, just as I start to drift off, Paul bangs on my door. (with that voice again) "Aimee...do you have a calculator I can borrow" And then Paul and his friend (who also has a really deep donky voice) decide to talk calculus for like an hour right outside my door. He's lucky I didn't try going back to bed or I would have been more mad.
ARRGG...the things I was thinking in my head...
So, this morning I seek revenge. It was tougher then I had expected. I got up at 6:45, slammed my door on the way to take a shower, and slammed the bathroom door too. I got out of the shower and slammed my door on the way in. Played my music too loud, and kept forgetting things in the kitchen, so I had to open and close my door like 15 times.
It didn't work. So, I did laundry (the machine is in the kitchen cause I live in student housing, and it's loud) and did dishes. This didn't work.
So I made coffee with my kettle that whistles. And, I didn't hear it right away because I was in the bathroom (ah hahaha...I was just chillin in there. I didn't even flush when I came out, so he knew, I'm soo evil). There's nothing like a whistling kettle to wake you up in the morning.
He went into the bathroom and slammed down the toilet seat. I think he might be mad...
But shit, I didn't get to wake you up until 8:30.
Tomorrow morning coffee is at 7am...oh crap, tomorrow's Saterday...next week Paul, I'll have my revenge :)
posted by Aimee at 5:33 AM
3 Comments:
Can't wait to hear all about it!!!
I'm so glad that you are finally relieving some of the pent up stress...I was beginning to think we may have to take away your driving priviledges on the weekend for fear you may run some poor kid over if he kind of looked like Paul!
Paul...I think Bri's fuckwit guys name was Paul as well...gives new meaning to what's in a name??
Boil the kettle and pour it in his lap!!!
Nothing says good morning like a 3rd degree burn!!!
HEY - READ MY GUESTBOOK SWEETIE...
Thumper
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